Remembering what I used to know

I am not a pack rat. I'm generally in favor of getting rid of anything that we don't anticipate wanting in the next few years, or that can be easily reacquired. But I do keep my old notebooks from high school and college. Once in a while I pull them out and marvel at all the things I used to know. Is that really my handwriting on all those pages of calculus equations and that exam on computational theory? Was that really me who took the train to Boston to read Charles Darwin's original letters for my fifty-page paper on women's science education in the nineteenth century? Did I seriously read all that Shakespeare when I was sixteen, and write pages upon pages analyzing it? And how come I can't remember any of that stuff now?

I volunteered to informally mentor some student entrepreneurs from my alma mater. This week I had my first phone call with the team that won this year's pitch competition. They said they wanted to talk about an initial investment and what their term sheet should look like. The night before, I did a little reading to refresh my memory. At first I couldn't believe how much I had forgotten in only three months, but after a while it started coming back to me. On the call, I was relieved that my experience kicked back in and I was able to flag and explain a bunch of issues they hadn't thought of. Which is as it should be, since I've worked with dozens of companies in the past few years and they're undergrads thinking about their first venture. Still, I feel like I have some catching up to do before returning to work.

This morning I had to do some more quick reading. The nonprofit board I joined had some questions about a large gift they had received, and after ten minutes of skimming through some emails and trust documents, I found myself on the phone with another longtime board member and attorney debating about variance powers. Thank goodness I spent those long nights last summer getting a local private foundation up and running, so I actually knew, more or less, what I was talking about.

It was good to use my brain again and to remember what I've been learning for the past few years. But remind me not to take on any other obligations over the next few months. I had to decline two farm outings with friends because I had conflicting meetings. Isn't that sort of missing the point of maternity leave?

In other news:

Twice this week, X only woke up once during the night. Hooray! And most of the other nights he woke up twice around 1 and 4. He has been pushing up and twisting. Any day now he's going to turn over. X has learned to bat the hanging objects in his play gym and has become acquainted with Iggy the Baby-Nibbling Iguana. He continues to be easy-going and happy, and a good eater and napper, making my maternity leave very pleasant.

K has a band-aid on his knee and has been telling everyone the sad story of how he fell. K can now read simple sentences on his own. He is back to counting snails every day, now that they're out of hibernation, and distinguishes between regular snails and "snail friends" (the ones at our house). This week he has been obsessed with the song "That's What Friends Are For". After watching the video on YouTube over and over, he first pretended he was Elton John (because Elton John is "super fancy") and now he likes to pretend he is Stevie Wonder.

JW is heading out of town for a few days on business this week, leaving me alone with the two kids for three nights in a row. I'm sure it will be fine. I envy him a little for being able to take off like that.

This week I went to the gym for the first time in a year. Today was my third day straight of working out. It may not sound like much, but I tend to get into ruts of not exercising and eating poorly, and then I have to snap out of them and resolve to get into good habits again. So three days is a good start. I don't know why it's so hard to maintain an exercise habit. I always feel good when I exercise regularly -- I have more energy, I feel happier and more optimistic, I feel proud of myself, I feel stronger and more flexible, I fit into my clothes better and feel better about my appearance. So why do I have to struggle to get myself to exercise, and why do I get out of the habit so easily? And why is it so hard to resist eating sugary foods, which make me feel crappy in just the opposite way that exercise makes me feel good? I never had a problem with retail therapy or being attracted to the wrong people, but this is my personal brand of self-destructiveness. I'm always hoping that one of these days I can make the good habits stick. At least I always keep trying again.