Brothers

People always ask me whether X and K have different personalities. For whatever reason, they like hearing that the answer is yes. X has a personality to match his executive look. K is more sensitive and more active.

K wants to hold my hand while we eat dinner, and often comes over mid-meal for a hug. Before I got pregnant, he was constantly asking to be picked up and carried, and he still likes to be carried when he can get away with it. He says "I love you" every five minutes. X doesn't mind snuggles, but mostly he likes being carried around for mobility purposes. The second I sit down, he's outta there. Probably more as a function of his age that his personality, while he likes us, he doesn't seem to care that much whether we're around.

When K was a baby, I would spend long nights holding him and pacing up and down with him to calm him down. X does not like to be picked up when he's sleepy. It actually makes him cry more.

When K was a baby, it took him a very long time to realize that he wouldn't starve if I did not feed him the second he got hungry. He'd start crying while I was fumbling with my nursing clothes, and I'd have to calm him down before feeding him. If X sees that I'm taking some steps toward feeding him, like walking upstairs, he waits and only complains if it seems like I've forgotten about him. In general, X gives ample warning before he gets really upset.

K does not like to play by himself, and if you suggest it, he protests, "But then I will be LONELY."  X can play independently for long stretches.

K likes me to do things for him, like put on his shoes or feed him the last few spoonfuls of soup. When K used to lose his pacifier at night, he would yell, "PAFA" or later, "PACIFIO!" until JW or I eventually got annoyed enough to come give it back to him. At 7 months, X likes to hold his own bottle and can recover his own pacifier and get it back in his mouth. I anticipate a lot of "Do it myself!" as he gets older.

K asks for help. X perseveres on his own. He will keep reaching for something until he falls flat on his face.

K was always wiggly. As a baby he was always practicing his next motor skill, and as a little kid he's always running around and climbing on everything. X is not nearly as active. He is content to sit in one place for long periods. When he does make a leap in motor skills, it seems very intentional, even though this may be unlikely given his age. For instance, K would roll over and over until he rolled out the door. X can roll, but rarely does, preferring to be upright. K would try over and over to stand up and to pull himself up until he was eventually able to do it on his own. X is now starting to get interested in standing up. But he doesn't make the same efforts K did. He just refuses to bend his legs when I try to put him down.

K is cautious. I never had to worry about him getting into dangerous situations that he wouldn't be able to get out of, and I can give him free rein when we're outside. I don't know yet what X will be like on this front, but I suspect he may be a little more reckless than his big brother. I can see him being so focused on doing something that he doesn't stop to consider whether it will get him in trouble. But we'll have to wait and see about that.

I love K for his sweetness, silliness, and energy, and I love X for his independence, calmness, and patience. And I hope that the words "Why can't you be more like your brother?" will never escape my lips.